1/2 c. Olive oil
1/2 c. Coffee grounds
1/4 c. Coarse sea salt
1. Blend oil, grounds and salt, then apply liberally from ankles to chest.
2. Standing in the bath/shower, begin wrapping cling wrap (firmly) from below. Start by bandaging each leg separately, then wrap your hips, torso and arms.
3. You'll need to kill about 45mins. Lie down or rest against the wall. Whatever you do, stay still.
4. Discard plastic. Scrub-off mixture using small, circular motions. (5 mins.) Rinse.
5. Now the hard part. To maintain the treatment's immediate effects, you'll need to avoid foods high in sodium, alcohol... basically, anything that may cause bloating.